It’s Okay To Seek Help
Have you ever felt the need to go see someone for help? You witnessed yourself down spiraling and you KNEW you needed to talk to someone or do something. So you went and found what you needed.
That’s what I did recently. I suffer from moderately severe depression. I have really low periods and that’s, unfortunately, when I start to notice the signs. Back in June, I saw myself down spiraling. I was so stressed out, I wasn’t eating, and I cried every day, sometimes multiple times, for a straight month. Often I would cry and have not a damn clue why. I had absolutely zero energy, all I wanted to do was sleep and I was ready to be in bed by like 4pm and I was moody and got irritated very easily.
I was constantly getting dizzy, I even threw up a couple of times due to severe stress, and I was miserable. I’d lost 30 pounds in 3 months and not in a healthy way, in a very destructive way. My body was literally screaming at me to stop this crazy cycle I was putting myself through.
Why am I telling you this?! Because it’s what made me seek help, but it wasn’t easy.
It wasn’t easy to admit to myself that I needed help. It wasn’t easy to tell Kris, my wonderful boyfriend, that I wanted to seek help. But I knew everything going on with me affected him as well and he deserved to know what I wanted and needed. That all I wanted from him was his support in my decision and a hug. In order to get to actually having the conversation with him about this, well, I wrote it down. I wrote it down, put it where I knew he would see it, and anxiously waited for him to come talk to me. The note was sort of an ice breaker for me. Writing my thoughts and feelings down has always been the best way I know how to properly form them.
Now let me ask you something, you sought out the help you needed and you’ve started to feel better, then something threatened your ability to go to therapy or the gym or get the help you needed, how would you react? How would you feel?
The other day, I thought I would have to give up therapy. It made me realize how much therapy has truly been helping me. I haven’t been going all that long. Every two weeks for about 2 & 1/2 months. But I have built a relationship with my therapist. And it TERRIFIED me to even think about starting over with someone completely different.
It truly hit home. Like I mean I was a broken down, burbling, snot-nose running down my face, red, ugly crying mess. You’ve been there right? Maybe not the exact situation but something hit home so hard it left you shaking and hopeless.
I didn’t realize until a sudden insurance change happened how much going to therapy has truly helped me.
This is truly hard for me to write. In the back of my head, for some unknown reason, a part of me tells myself that ‘therapy’ is a dirty word and that it’s something I should be ashamed of. I felt, and sometimes still do feel, that I wasn’t ‘broken’ enough to deserve a therapists time. I felt ashamed for even wanting to go because in the back of my head I heard someone, somewhere telling me that other people have it so much worse. And that may be true.
Or maybe, like I believe, everyone has different shit to deal with & handles certain situations in different ways. I think I might feel this way because I truly feel the need to have everything figured out. But I don’t. No one ever does. I’m finding out that life is a constant learning experience, and that it’s okay to not be okay. I’m not broken, but I did need help. I was reaching a breaking point. And I want you to know that it is OKAY to want help. It is OKAY to not have all your shit together. As long, as you try and DO something about it. Maybe therapy isn’t your route, Maybe exercising is, Maybe meditating will help you most, Maybe writing in a journal will be your route, And that is OKAY.
You have to do what is best FOR YOU.
I also want to say that it is perfectly okay to pick and choose who you talk to about how you feel. You don’t owe anyone an explanation when it comes to your mental and emotional well being. The people who truly care for you will realize you are doing what’s best for you, even if you don’t want to share every thought and feeling with them per say.
If you feel you may need some type of help, please don’t hesitate to get it. You deserve to get to a good place mentally, emotionally & physically. A happy place. You deserve help just like the person next to you. I swear the resources are there, for whatever you may need, you just have to get real with yourself and decide that you need a change.
About The Author:
Alex is a 24 year old, small town girl from Maryland, where she resides with her boyfriend & furbabies. She’s a huge family person. She has a passion for food & helping people with their own self-love journey’s. One of her favorite mottos is; Be You. Do You. For You.
Hello, I’m Thuy of honeybunnytwee. I write a Wellness Wednesday guest bloggers series. Send me an article or link to a blog post about health and wellness, self-care, fitness, or mental health at firstname.lastname@example.org. Upon review, you’ll have a chance to be featured! I’m always looking for more Wellness Wednesday submissions.